Beautiful Depression
by Okamidemon
Summary: (I AM NOT A FAN OF DEPRESSION OR ANYTHING OK!) Red... Red... That's his favorite color... I love him so much that my heart beats so slow that it hurts... THIS IS A KIDD/LAW LAW/KIDD fanfic


A/N: Ok so... I am not like a "Go Depression!" person ok? So don't attack me... I had felt this way before a lot, maybe like everyday? So this is practically based on how I literally felt in real life. If you get offended or if I cause you too want to punch me, I apologize, but... (don't punch me) all I want to say before you read this one shot, depression isn't something to really joke about... even though i can handle mine easily, it's not a fun thing to go through...

Well, before I start going on a rant, if you choose to keep reading, I HOPE YOU LIKE IT~!

-(What happened to the line thing?!)-

I stared at the broad back of the one I loved. His red hair spiked up, being brushed back with a hair band. He laughed happily, separating his lips that were lined with red. He opened his eyes, showing the crimson red eyes. He adjusted his red fur jacket as a cold wind blew at us. Everything about him was red… Red matched him… He and the color red were a perfect match.

I loved him for so long, but of course it was only one sided. I haven't loved another in a long time… Since the day Cora-san died, I could never look at someone and have thoughts of always being with them. Of course, my feeling towards Cora-san and him are different… But what is the same is that it is unreachable. I can't grab a hold of the thin red thread that is flowing from his finger… As I follow the red thread, I noticed that it was attached to another person. A woman…

I wanted to cut that thread. I wanted to free him from that trap he had stepped into. But I couldn't… And because I couldn't all I could think of is him and that woman. I want him to myself...

 **.**

People think of depression as something that is horrible… Nothing good will come out of it. It is just an annoying pain in your heart. I held the spindle of red thread between my fingers. I pinched the tiny end and pulled it as far as my arm could go. I cut the thread and smiled. I don't agree with everyone else… They are all wrong. I had this so called 'horrible' depression. I would always feel a sharp pain in my chest when I see him with her. My head began hurting and I thought of my death. I tied a loop in the thread and turned to grab some scissors.

Depression isn't something horrible… It is… in fact beautiful. I grabbed a pair of red scissors and snipped the thread, separating it from the spindle. I turned back around and slipped the loop onto my middle finger. I hummed a tune happily as I tied another loop at the other end. Where should I put this one? I wiggled my fingers in front of me, staring at the many red threads looping around them, "ah~ They are covering my tattoos…"

That won't do… He probably wants to see them. I frowned, dropping half of the many loops onto the ground, "look… you can see them again…" I smiled. I touched the crimson red that was running down the cold surface, "are you cold?"

I waited…

I smiled once more, "you're so funny…" I began humming again. I no longer felt any pain… More like… I feel it, but I enjoy it. That churning in your stomach… The excruciating pain in your heart that never kills you… The thoughts that fill your head, telling you that you are useless and that you should just die. "People won't notice anything when you die," I chuckled. All of this became my pleasure. I liked the feeling of these… I licked the crimson red off of my fingers. I reached to the cold surface once more, sliding my fingers over the surface's curves.

I touched the single red thread around the neck and traced it up to mine. It was tight around our necks. The loop around me was as tight as his, cutting into my flesh with a single touch. I grasped the face, bringing my face towards his. I smiled and softly touched the cold red lining. I ran my right hand down to the middle of the thread that tied our necks together. I could already feel the thread slowly cutting my flesh inside, "ah ha ha~ I feel it against my veins…"

I hovered my right hand above the middle of the thread. I raised it higher and higher until I could touch his cold face. Depression may be painful… but it creates something as beautiful as this… What can be more beautiful than him, sitting in his favorite color. His red hair damp with even more red… His lips red lining darkened to crimson… And his eyes completely red without any sparkle of red. How beautiful this is… I kissed his cold lips and smiled once more. I loosened my arm, letting it fall onto the sharp red thread, "I love you… Eustass-"

-(Seriously... where is the line thing...)-

A/N: So... if you read all of this and you want to punch me, I am very sorry (don't punch me please...). For those of you who are still ok... I thank you for reading this tiny story and if you like these depressing things, please do stick around me cause I am a pretty sad person...


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